Brain/emotion emptying commences:

I am miserable. I live in a town with people I don't relate to. I work a job with people I don't relate to and also suck. Selfish, republican Christians who do not tolerate non-selfish, non-republican non-Christians.

I drink too much, everyone including myself know this. When I drink now, I get ornery and 86'd most of the time. I drink to drown the lonliness. I drink so that I don't have to face reality, because reality, in my observance, is really sad.

I just made myself not go get more beer, that may last for a few minutes. Is it bad to have a poor attendance record at work if you hate your job? Uncle Sam wants his fucking payment.

I HAVE to move back to the west coast to keep my sanity, but I am afraid. Can I find a job? Can I keep from drinking myself to oblivion? I wait for the answer from my liver.

Just because I don't contact my friends doesn't mean I don't love them. Just don't want to drag them into the pit.